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Recent Screening of the documentary “Finding Kind”

Recently, I was privileged to be a part of a very special event.  On January 8th, I saw the documentary, Finding Kind, for the first time.  It immediately sparked an interest and a desire to spread the message about girl-on-girl “crime” (physical fighting, name-calling, threats, power struggles, competition, manipulation, secrets, rumors, and ostracizing other girls, as defined by the filmmakers).

In February, 2009, while attending Pepperdine University, Lauren Parsekian and Molly Thompson decided to create a documentary that spawned three national tours and a movement to promote healthy female relationships and the simple act of KINDness.

With the generosity of the St. Charles Youth Commission and the Arcada Theatre we were able to host this documentary on April 22 with approximately 400 mothers and daughters in attendance.

As a psychologist, I often see the effects of girl-on-girl “crime” and how it can impact the emotional well-being of the victim and the aggressor. If we are all truly honest with ourselves, we have probably been both.  Both sides of this behavior suffer, and anxiety, depression and self-esteem issues are frequently a consequence. It has its way of seeping into our female culture and being normalized as “typical” girl behavior.  But it’s not, and the change can be as simple as one person apologizing, or as one very young girl pledged to do {today}, use KIND words when talking to others.  It sounds simple, but how many times do we allow our insecurities to fuel negative thoughts and criticisms of each other?

Personally and professionally, I can say with confidence that we never know what someone else is going through.  So, if I can challenge you to do anything, it would be to look deeper and see the good in others.  And most, importantly, be KIND.


– Michelle Bidwell, Psy.D.

Licensed Clinical Psychologist


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